Saturday, April 07, 2012

My Green T-Shirt

I’m not an environmentalist type, all those youngsters going green!, no, not really. Come summer, however, green is my favourite colour. Any shades will do — (Did you know there’s a shade called Islamic green, or India green, Pakistan green, Paris green, Persian green...) — preferably, either the lighter tone, or the darker ones. And, I want them in my T-shirts.

I’m also not a fashion-type. I cannot spend more than 15 minutes dressing up. Yet, my job and my age (I’m no longer a teenager, unfortunately) demand that I look decent, presentable. And, this is very difficult to achieve unless you go for formals. Formals during summer, especially when you also have a job to earn your bread, and it doesn’t involve sitting on an AC room all they long, is not the brightest idea. Hence, I depend on my tees.

Not necessarily green, any colour would do, as long as they are bright. Here’s why I love my tees.

During summer, you want to avoid wearing too many clothes. A T-shirt solves the problems of undershirts. It can act both as a baniyan and, what else, a T-shirt. A good, cotton T-shirt will also soak that trickling sweat from underneath your earlobes since you are not one of those lucky ones who get to spend the entire day in an AC room.

And they are so easy to deal with. You just find a clean one in your closet, and wear it. Done. Not enough? Okay. Here is the best part. With a T-shirt, and a little bit of imagination, you can really spice up your look.

As for myself, since I’m really on the other side of this abs business, T-shirts really don’t suit me; that’s what I was told. T-shirts look good on those who have biceps, and a defined chest, and a flat tummy, I was told. Now, that a lie to make people like me feel bad about ourselves, and I don’t buy it. T-shirts look good on me too, if I wear it with confidence and verve. But, the short-sleeved thing makes your hands look too wiry. No problem. Throw a long-sleeved shirt on, and leave it unbuttoned. See! You are good to go. Ideally, in a situation like this, a contrast works well. If your tee is dark, make the shirt light. If prefer a loose white shirt with my green ones. Instead of a shirt, you can also wear a light cotton jacket, one of those things you can pick up on the roadside.

Or, you can just wear some jewellery. Perhaps a designer locket hung to a black thread. If you are still worried about your long, thin, naked hands, wear a bracelet on your wrist, one of those wooden thinly you get at those junk stores outside a mall. Or an oversized watch. Anything to distract the attention.

Or, if your hair is long enough, use some gel and spike them, to let the attention shift  from your body to your head. Or wear a fancy cap. Summer is the perfect excuse for wearing caps. Or, use one of those cool shades. Do you have a pair of Rayban? I couldn’t care less. I wear numbered glasses.

Or, better still, wear a stole. Traditionally, stoles were worn by Christian clergies, and/or by men in middle-east to save themselves from the sand, and/or villagers in India, again, to wipe the sweat from their brows. Nowadays, they have become a popular accessory in man’s fashion. You wonder how those middle-eastern scarves with red and white stripes (or black and white) that Yasser Arafat made so popular have made their appearance at the neighbourhood store. Yes, wrap one of those around your neck and, hey, you look cool. And, it will also help you combat the sweat.

But, what about downstairs? That’s another great thing about wearing T-shirts. You don’t have to worry about what kind of trousers you are wearing, as long as it’s a jeans. You can continue to wear the same thing until you begin to smell, and no one would notice. Though I’d like classic blue Denim, you can wear anything really. The same goes with the footwear — shoes, chappals, Kolhapuris, anything. For the summer, I, however, prefer canvas shoes. And, these days they came in so many colours and designs.

In short, my sartorial logic is simple. Find a clean T-shirt; the brighter the better.

(Tailpiece: A note on T-shirts with graffiti. Wear a T-shirt with graffiti only when it suits your mood and personality. If your t-shit has a smiley face and you are in a sour mood, it doesn’t make sense. Like all those youngsters wearing those ‘Being Human’ T-shirts. Where did this blasted ‘being human’ T-shirt fashion start? Blame it on Salman Khan... I’ve a Tantra T-shirt that repeats the Pink Floyd line: “I’ve become comfortably numb.” I wear it when I’m really comfortably numb. These occasions are not rare.)

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