At 36

I was born in the middle of emergency, in an outhouse, on a makeshift bed made of haystack, in the premises of my father’s ancestral property, in a non-descript village in the interiors of Nalbari district in Assam. I was a post-mature baby and I am told that the labour was difficult. Of course, there was no healthcare facility. But, there was the village Ayurvedic doctor who kept vigil for the entire night. Years later, my parents could not decide on the day I was born. According to my mother, I was born on July 17, a few seconds before the breaking of dawn. My father said it would be July 18 since according to the English calendar a new day starts at midnight, unlike the Assamese calendar where the new day begins with the breaking dawn.

I have a charmed childhood, where it did not matter that we were on the poorer side in a rich neighbourhood.

There were issues at home, but nothing to hinder our day-to-life.

In my early school days, we were in the same locality, the headquarters of Nagaon district, but moved around, from one area to another. In the process, lost old friends, made new one; but nothing lasted.

Then, when I was in class IX, my father transferred to another district, where everything was different, from language to local culture. Here, I was a better student, and very, very introvert. For years, I couldn’t make friends. I wanted to die. I studied hard because my brother did not do well in studies and it broke my mother’s heart; I wanted to redeem my brother’s failure. My brother had problems with his eyes in his childhood, and I would pray to god every evening, make my brother’s eyes well. The God did. A while later, I found that I would need glasses, for the rest of my life. I don’t regret it. I still do anything for my brother. I had privileges he did not have. He had privileges he did not know how to use.

Unlike most families, I am not very close to my parents or siblings; I am not further either. We don’t talk for weeks, and when we talk it’s normal.

Some years ago, someone asked me what was my greatest wish, I said, I want my parents to be happy, always. This may sound selfless, but it is very selfish. I know my parents would be happy if I am happy; and I’d do anything to make them happy, things that is humanly possible.